Finally... We have experienced an unbreakable language barrier. Awesome. And yet we have fully fallen in love with Italy... We may not be able to communicate anything other than "spaghetti?" but we love it. and it is good. Let me catch you up so far:
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Magic Cities
Okay this is a little overdue, since we left Paris over a week and a half ago, but what can ya do. Since Heather is catching you up on our activities, I thought I would write a little sumthin sumthin on the side. And also I just like seeing how many people I can irritate with my not very insightful poetry about hot chocolate. (by the way, has anyone else read the poem '2B or not 2B'?? Its at the beginning of Russell Brand's Booky Wooky. Seriously such a good poem...)
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Nice is not Nice.
Anyways, we just spent the past few days in Nice, a place which is now my least favorite city in the world. Apparently I missed the memo that in Nice, tall frizzy haired Canadian = hooker. We stayed the first two days in a relatively nice part of town, but then had to move because it was all booked up. We moved to the Belle Meuniere, which was a nice enough place, but was located smack dab in the middle of the ghetto. I am not kidding, we were next door to Nice's leading Gentlemans Club.
Please enjoy the order of these shops
However, we managed to make friends with three Australian guys, a Canadian guy and a German and British hostel worker, and thus managed to not be approached by most of the creepers.
Mick, Heather, PAVEL and Adrian
However, I would like to note that in the space of four days, I was asked how much I cost twice, glared at numerous times, sworn at at least three times, felt up once and pushed off a train once. Keep in mind this was while wearing clothing that my mother picked out for me. I will be completely honest, Nice was one of the scariest places I'e been to, including the London Dungeon. So I'm saying no to creepface and never returning.
MY BATTLE SCARS. okay actually my dress just scraped my face.
My name is Inigo Montoya.
However, while in Nice we also managed to make day trips out- we went to the Grand Prix in Monaco for two days and to Cannes during the film festival once.
FAST CARS GO VROOM VROOM
ITS A FERRARI!!!!!!!! nbd.
I also forced Heather through a Matisse museum and we hung out a beautiful Russian Cathedral for a few hours.
Pictures will follow soon, but this hostel doesn't have anywhere to plug in a zip drive, so that will have to wait.
Anyways:
Monaco- One of the most beautiful cities on earth. That place is clean and RICH. The only cars you see are Ferraris, Mazeratis, Bentleys, Audis, Rolls, and basically any other car that costs more than my life. It is also home to the worlds largest yachts. That place just screams MONEY!!!! Like seriously- was walking down the street and saw stores for selling million dollar homes, for buying and selling yachts and for buying and selling airplanes. A 1983 747 was only two million, if anyone is interested. Monaco is also extremely clean, with people wandering all over the place sweeping up cigarette butts and hosing off sidewalks. This contrasts directly with Nice, which smells alot like stale urine.
Cannes- First off, I don't care what anyone says, its 'cAns' not 'cOHns'. There is no O in the name. Secondly, the film festival is not alot to see- just a bunch of white tents and really skinny girls running around with lanyards. So, Heather and I had a beach day. (which was AWESOME!!)
So anyways, we are now in Milano, in a clean, safe hostel. We found it with no difficulty and when we walked in, the snack bar lady gave us both a glass of wine 'to welcome us' to the hostel. I think I'm gonna like it here.
Please enjoy the order of these shops
However, we managed to make friends with three Australian guys, a Canadian guy and a German and British hostel worker, and thus managed to not be approached by most of the creepers.
Mick, Heather, PAVEL and Adrian
However, I would like to note that in the space of four days, I was asked how much I cost twice, glared at numerous times, sworn at at least three times, felt up once and pushed off a train once. Keep in mind this was while wearing clothing that my mother picked out for me. I will be completely honest, Nice was one of the scariest places I'e been to, including the London Dungeon. So I'm saying no to creepface and never returning.
MY BATTLE SCARS. okay actually my dress just scraped my face.
My name is Inigo Montoya.
However, while in Nice we also managed to make day trips out- we went to the Grand Prix in Monaco for two days and to Cannes during the film festival once.
FAST CARS GO VROOM VROOM
ITS A FERRARI!!!!!!!! nbd.
I also forced Heather through a Matisse museum and we hung out a beautiful Russian Cathedral for a few hours.
Pictures will follow soon, but this hostel doesn't have anywhere to plug in a zip drive, so that will have to wait.
Anyways:
Monaco- One of the most beautiful cities on earth. That place is clean and RICH. The only cars you see are Ferraris, Mazeratis, Bentleys, Audis, Rolls, and basically any other car that costs more than my life. It is also home to the worlds largest yachts. That place just screams MONEY!!!! Like seriously- was walking down the street and saw stores for selling million dollar homes, for buying and selling yachts and for buying and selling airplanes. A 1983 747 was only two million, if anyone is interested. Monaco is also extremely clean, with people wandering all over the place sweeping up cigarette butts and hosing off sidewalks. This contrasts directly with Nice, which smells alot like stale urine.
Cannes- First off, I don't care what anyone says, its 'cAns' not 'cOHns'. There is no O in the name. Secondly, the film festival is not alot to see- just a bunch of white tents and really skinny girls running around with lanyards. So, Heather and I had a beach day. (which was AWESOME!!)
So anyways, we are now in Milano, in a clean, safe hostel. We found it with no difficulty and when we walked in, the snack bar lady gave us both a glass of wine 'to welcome us' to the hostel. I think I'm gonna like it here.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Versailles
Okay, since Heather is being a lame ass tired and refusing to write any blog posts (she instead sits behind me and edits my typos as I write), I am writing another post.
Five Minutes to Live
FIRST OFF- check the older posts, we've put pictures up on them, though sometimes you have to click past the jump to see.
Okay, so a few months ago I came across a random blog on the internet that talked about what people would do if they had five minutes to live. (no idea what the url is, but perhaps it can be googled?). Anyways, I didn't give it much thought until yesterday, when I was bored on the train and the song "4 minutes to live" came on. Well, since boredom is the mother of useless thought, I came up with my answer. I won't post Heathers as thats her call if she wants to, but mine is as follows:
1. Write a letter to my family and friends, telling them how much I love them and how much I valued having them in my life.
2. Write a second note to my parents, asking them to take my life savings and use it to take all of the aforementioned family and friends out for drinks (I don't really care about what happens to my body, funeral wise, but I thought that would be a good way)
3. Run up to strangers on the street, hugging and kissing them and telling them not to waste their life\
4. For the last minute, strip buck ass naked and run screaming down the street (making as much noise as possible) and then dive into a body of water or a pile of snow... Whatever is handy.
What would you do?
Okay, so a few months ago I came across a random blog on the internet that talked about what people would do if they had five minutes to live. (no idea what the url is, but perhaps it can be googled?). Anyways, I didn't give it much thought until yesterday, when I was bored on the train and the song "4 minutes to live" came on. Well, since boredom is the mother of useless thought, I came up with my answer. I won't post Heathers as thats her call if she wants to, but mine is as follows:
1. Write a letter to my family and friends, telling them how much I love them and how much I valued having them in my life.
2. Write a second note to my parents, asking them to take my life savings and use it to take all of the aforementioned family and friends out for drinks (I don't really care about what happens to my body, funeral wise, but I thought that would be a good way)
3. Run up to strangers on the street, hugging and kissing them and telling them not to waste their life\
4. For the last minute, strip buck ass naked and run screaming down the street (making as much noise as possible) and then dive into a body of water or a pile of snow... Whatever is handy.
What would you do?
The Parisian Workout Plan
This system of excersize, also known as "how to eat a diet consisting solely of bread, cheese and wine and not gain weight" is what Heather and I followed (somewhat successfully) whilst in Paris.
1. Grab a big ass bottle of water. You should put this in your chic little purse, and it will ensure the weight training portion of your regime.
2. Now strap on your favorite pair of heels- it is important that you always look extremely fashionable.
3. Trot down the stairs from your 8th floor hostel room/apartment to the street (about 9 flights of stairs altogether)
4. Walk very very quickly in your heels to the nearest metro. Watch that you don't break an ankle, as the streets are incongruously placed at a 30 degree angle to horizontal, and that is somewhat difficult to navigate in heels.
5. Walk down the three flights of stairs to get to the metro. Make sure you're going at a fast pace- you don't want to slow down everybody else.
6. Stand on the train, keeping your balance. This will work your core muscles as you struggle to stay upright against the stopping and starting of the Metro. You will also have to move adroitly from side to side to avoid the rather handy frenchmen.
7. Time to switch trains- you're at an overground station, which means you have about five flights of stairs to climb. GO.
8. You've arrived at your stop- walk very very quickly down the stairs and then continue to trot to the nearest cafe.
9. Sit your ass down and get some crepes chantilly and a double expresso. You deserve it.
1. Grab a big ass bottle of water. You should put this in your chic little purse, and it will ensure the weight training portion of your regime.
2. Now strap on your favorite pair of heels- it is important that you always look extremely fashionable.
3. Trot down the stairs from your 8th floor hostel room/apartment to the street (about 9 flights of stairs altogether)
4. Walk very very quickly in your heels to the nearest metro. Watch that you don't break an ankle, as the streets are incongruously placed at a 30 degree angle to horizontal, and that is somewhat difficult to navigate in heels.
5. Walk down the three flights of stairs to get to the metro. Make sure you're going at a fast pace- you don't want to slow down everybody else.
6. Stand on the train, keeping your balance. This will work your core muscles as you struggle to stay upright against the stopping and starting of the Metro. You will also have to move adroitly from side to side to avoid the rather handy frenchmen.
7. Time to switch trains- you're at an overground station, which means you have about five flights of stairs to climb. GO.
8. You've arrived at your stop- walk very very quickly down the stairs and then continue to trot to the nearest cafe.
9. Sit your ass down and get some crepes chantilly and a double expresso. You deserve it.
NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So apparently we've been neglecting the blog whilst in transit through France... (i apologize in advance for any spelling or punctuation mistakes as the keyboard here is completely different and thus harder to find the keys on...) So we've now arrived in the lovely city of Nice, which looks completely different from what i expected!!!! Cannes and Nice aren't your typical french neighborhoods, as they look like a mixture of Miami, Nevada, Kamloops, and Paris... we've got red rock mountains (Nevada for the color of rock, Kamloops for the shape of the mountains) Miami style houses everywhere you look, and then BAM you have a 500 year old building that is absolutely breathtaking... Amazing how these things come together so well... I also would like to mention that although the ocean is rather on the large side of things... Nice has hidden it well considering Niki and I walked around for about 2 hours yesterday and couldn't see the water no matter how high up we went!!! Oh well, thats our quest for today!!! to find a beach and get some sun after so much rain in London, wind in Paris, and more rain in Grenoble. you know, the whole "timer in the corner of the screen telling you how much time you have left to be on the internet" is really not as awesome as it sounds... especially since mine is getting dangerously close to 0... will update again soon!!!!!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Wheels of Cheese Consumed: 2. Baguettes Eaten: 1. Bottles of Wine Drank: 5. Calories Acknowledged: 13.
As you can tell, we had one hell of a night. Although we originally intended to have a quiet night- drink a bottle of wine, do some laundry, early to bed, etc, we ended up getting a little shitwhistled. 
After two or three hours of conversation by ourselves, we met Steve (Stephe?) and Alex (Alecx?) with whom we discussed for several hours about politics, what constitutes a rap song, religion, love, if a liberal arts degree is actually useful, why French people have weird spelling, and exactly HOW about is pronounced. We didn't get to bed until very late, leading to me almost being lynched by the maid this morning. oops.
I was originally planning on posting pictures, but I left my cord up in my room so that'll have to wait.
To Montmartre!
When in doubt, pinkie out
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Reasons Why I like Hostels
Okay, so after six days and four hostels, I feel like I am qualified to write this post. Lord knows that it will later be followed by a "Why I LOATHE Hostels" post after travel has "opened my mind" (which I think we can all agree is a nice way of saying how travel makes you "bitter and homesick"). But for now, I am living "La Vie en Rose":
1. Price- i don't think its actually possible to find cheaper accomadations. And by accomadations, I mean the place must include an indoor bed, plumbing and someone who cleans it on a regular basis. Sleeping under a bush does not count as accomadation in my books (call me a snob...).
2. It hones your navigational skills. When you look up a hostel online, It gives you lovely directions that look like "take train ____ to its last stop, get off, go up the stairs, turn left and walk 100 metres". It sounds incredibly simple. It leaves room for a hell of alot of interpretation. What happens if the station has four exits?? and my left or the left that you take when you're looking at the station?? It says to follow the canal- THE CANAL GOES UNDERGROUND!!!! I am not a mole- I cannot FOLLOW that. Couple that with the fact that very few people seem to know what the streets around where they live are named and you have a whole lotta LOST going on.
3. You meet people! Heather, Beth and I spent a half hour one night getting serenaded by an elderly gentleman who smoked profusely, sang songs from the musical 'Oliver!' and recited John Lennon poetry. It was fantastic! and incredibly enhanced by the large amounts of cider that had been drunk. I also met a Spanish man who worked as a chef in London and toured art museums in his spare time.
4. It makes you appreciate the small things- clean laundry, getting six hours of uninterupted sleep, hot showers!!!! I cried a little this morning when I discovered how to get the hot water to work (turn it until the red dot is to the right and then PUMP). Honestly, after two days of not showering, then two days of doing the hokey pokey cold shower (you put your left foot in.... you put your left foot out....) I can positively say that HOT WATER is what it is all about.
5. The fact that there is a little timer controlling your internet time.
I GOTTA GO. HI PARIS!!!
UPDATE: as my lack of internet time made a point of- hostelling makes you really consider how important that tv in your hotel room is- are you really gonna watch it? and the little timer in the bottom corner of the computer screen- do you really need to spend hours internet surfing?
Anyways, I guess I'll add to this list if I think of any more.
1. Price- i don't think its actually possible to find cheaper accomadations. And by accomadations, I mean the place must include an indoor bed, plumbing and someone who cleans it on a regular basis. Sleeping under a bush does not count as accomadation in my books (call me a snob...).
2. It hones your navigational skills. When you look up a hostel online, It gives you lovely directions that look like "take train ____ to its last stop, get off, go up the stairs, turn left and walk 100 metres". It sounds incredibly simple. It leaves room for a hell of alot of interpretation. What happens if the station has four exits?? and my left or the left that you take when you're looking at the station?? It says to follow the canal- THE CANAL GOES UNDERGROUND!!!! I am not a mole- I cannot FOLLOW that. Couple that with the fact that very few people seem to know what the streets around where they live are named and you have a whole lotta LOST going on.
3. You meet people! Heather, Beth and I spent a half hour one night getting serenaded by an elderly gentleman who smoked profusely, sang songs from the musical 'Oliver!' and recited John Lennon poetry. It was fantastic! and incredibly enhanced by the large amounts of cider that had been drunk. I also met a Spanish man who worked as a chef in London and toured art museums in his spare time.
the man who sang to us and recited poetry
(called us Lucy, Lisa and Beth)
5. The fact that there is a little timer controlling your internet time.
I GOTTA GO. HI PARIS!!!
UPDATE: as my lack of internet time made a point of- hostelling makes you really consider how important that tv in your hotel room is- are you really gonna watch it? and the little timer in the bottom corner of the computer screen- do you really need to spend hours internet surfing?
Anyways, I guess I'll add to this list if I think of any more.
An Ode to Hot Showers and Hot Chocolate
After an especially nice morning, I wrote this ode at breakfast:
Showers and Hot Chocolate-the best way to start my day!
You give me a reason to get on my way.
Your presence makes me warm inside and out,
While some people favour coffee or tea,
I say NUH-UH! its showers and chocolate for me!
Showers and Hot Chocolate-the best way to start my day!
You give me a reason to get on my way.
Your presence makes me warm inside and out,
And even make my feet smell less like dead trouts.
Together you make me fresh, full and happy,
You even inspire me to not kill my family.
While some people favour coffee or tea,
I say NUH-UH! its showers and chocolate for me!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
PARIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well folks, we made it!!!!!!!!! after a long day of travel and a missed ferry which turned out to be a very wonderful thing.
Lets start off by telling you about the day yesterday!!!
Lets start off by telling you about the day yesterday!!!
Monday, May 3, 2010
quickly now
Hey, just letting everyone know that we are alive, well and heading off to Paris within the next 24 hours, where we will stay for about a week.
Been busy the past couple days, and going out at night- we went to an arcade, a movie, dinner, a pub and clubbing (over two nights).
AND- can anybody help me out with this- Heather and I both got asked if we were Bavarian Bar Maids.... Is that code for something?
Anyways, gotta go, I think the other two are out of the shower!
Bonjour Paris!
Been busy the past couple days, and going out at night- we went to an arcade, a movie, dinner, a pub and clubbing (over two nights).
AND- can anybody help me out with this- Heather and I both got asked if we were Bavarian Bar Maids.... Is that code for something?
Anyways, gotta go, I think the other two are out of the shower!
Bonjour Paris!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Rainy London Town
As of yet, we've been in London for three days... As I don't actually have that much time on my internet and also I'm hungry, I'm gonna try and make this quick!
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